How do you cope with something like this? And, naming Peanut.

I know there is a real chance that this sweet innocent peanut is going to be born and need multiple surgeries, starting right at birth. I know that someday, to increase her life expectancy she is going to need a heart transplant.  I have all this information, but I can do nothing but wait.

I can't get it off my mind. I love her so much. I didn't care if she were a boy or a girl, my only hope was that she was healthy and I am scared to death about what all of this means. What the overall picture will look like. Will it effect her development? Will she be living with a lot of pain? Can she play like normal kids? I am so worried for her.

I know no matter what, I will do what she needs me to do to help her. There is no question in my mind that I will endure and love her to no end through whatever bumps and twists this new journey takes us on. I just wish, I pray, I hope, that it was a simple mistake. That it was because the tech couldn't get a good angle. Or, even if there is a problem, it isn't as severe as they think it is.

I love this child, I love all of my children. And just the thought of even a chance of losing one, is so overwhelming. I don't know how other's have done it. But God, please grant me the strength to get through this for my little one.

It's unfortunate that my first name choice is so popular because of a movie. This is a name I've had in mind since before we had Emma. Seeing as what we are going to be enduring, I am going to use it, despite it's popularity. The original plan was to name her Ava, but as things change, so did our name choice.


Isabella \i-sa-
bella, isab(el)-la\ as a girl's name is a variant of Elizabeth (Hebrew) and Isabel (Hebrew), and the meaning of Isabella is "God's promise; God is my oath".



Michele \m(i)-che-
le\ as a girl's name (also used as boy's name Michele), is a variant of Michaela (Hebrew) andMichelle (French, Hebrew), and the meaning of Michele is "who resembles God?".

So, her name will be Isabella Michele

If anyone is going to be there and help us all through this, it is God and as a family, we all need that support.